Darkness of the Mind

Untitled

2009-02-12T01:22:00.001-08:00

-Untitled-

It's a half heart with a penchant for a lie;
And abysmal dream that's savored 'til we die.
A sparkling hope and an excited air,
Disregard for the morally right or fair.
A half hearted mechanism, made without a soul,
Laughing at the inconsistencies as it deals the final blow.
Keep reaching now, keep reaching now,
For that part of you that's true,
Ignoring the black mark,
That park that makes you you.
It's a diseased scorpion, a serpent in the rough,
No one ever said that it was ever smart or tough,
But yet it manipulates the very mind it wields,
Breaking down the barriers, eviscerating shields.
You can't hide in the corners, the still parts of your mind,
It's hard to look the other way when it's yourself you find.
Keep reaching now, keep reaching up,
For the part of you that's good,
Push aside the darkness,
To find the soul you should.

Hit the Road

2009-02-08T23:42:00.000-08:00

Hit The Road

Quarters eaten by phone booths,
slot machines, dingy back-woods carnivals.
Strewn about in the passenger seat between-
Receipts for slices of cherry pie, and 15 gallon tanks of gas.

Hands with bitten nails, chipped black polish,
Calloused from gripping the steering wheel;
The reins of an Appaloosa gelding, the sides of old oak bars.
A life-line dissected by secrets.

A back seat rumpled with bohemian dresses,
a faded pair of converse sneakers;
Twice-worn jeans with holes in the knees, pine cones and bits of sage;
A half-smoked pack of Turkish Silvers and a jar of strawberry jam.

Lips bruised by the wind and sun, and the kisses of wayfaring strangers,
Stained by the juices of peaches and cherries, fresh picked and bursting ripe.
Dazed by the humming vibration of a gypsy tune,
And tingling from the touch of cool starlit snow on mountain-tops.

And there's nothing in the way, nothing holding back,
Just open arms and bare feet dancing in the cool grass,
A heart made for shifting gears and tires spinning across the 'great wide open.'
A mind given up to the sun, the moon, the stars and the endless road.

Temptress

2009-02-08T23:39:00.000-08:00

Temptress

Jumping off the cliff
With the wind running
Skeletal fingers through tousled hair
The hands of an indelicate imagined lover
Below the darkness giving way
To lapping waves of sea or rock
Encompassing screaming joy
The leap- the fall- the flying freedom
Such a vivid vision it was
The ebb and flow of laughter and tension
Lilies crushed between whispering lips
Keeping the secrets and illusions in
Tempt me darling-Tempt me

(c)CS

Her Lips are Dark

2008-11-14T13:53:00.000-08:00

Her lips are dark,
With the stain of the season's
First blackberries,
Plucked from their dew-dropped homes,
By eager, reverent hands.
Her lips are dark,
With the kiss,
Of a dark moon rose,
Trailing over her skin.
Full of promises, a lover in the night
Full of dreams, nestled in satin sheets.
Her lips are dark,
With the whisper of death,
Circling, calling, crying,
Bliss and passion now gone,
Lost to otherworld dreams.

-C-

Zombi-fi-cation

2008-11-08T12:27:00.000-08:00

B and I were at home and the phone rang and said something about zombies and we opened the door and there was some small critter there and we had to kill because it was zombie-fied. This went on for a few days, and I distinctly remember there being a zombie praying mantis and a zombie crow.

Then Brandon had to go out of town for a awhile (where or why I don't recall.) and I was outside talking to the neighbors and there was this woman standing under this tree and I realized she was a zombie and I started yelling at everyone, and some cop tried to shoot her, but he was a moron and no matter how many times I said 'shoot her in the fucking head' he could not grasp the concept... so I finally hit her on the head with some large blunt object (pick-axe, maybe?)

Anyway, so everyone decided to go back to their apartments (I know, brilliant) because it was getting dark- and everything is more scary at night, you know. I talked this girl into going back to my apartment with me because she was in training for the military and had a gun.

We got inside and I opened the patio door to make sure there was no one out there, and there wasn't. Then I shut it and realized that I had shut Nima out, so I opened it but I hadn't really shut Nima out- there was a little brown Pug out there. (Hence forth referred to as 'Pugsly.') So I let him in and we were going to see if he turned into a Zombie-Pug (which he never did.) Then I shut the blinds, but they kept blowing about, which was really bugging me because I didn't particularly want to see outside.

We had a gun and I kept forgetting to get it out and put the bullets in. It was severe ADD time in dream-land and that was problematic. The Military chick was in the bathroom and I looked out the peephole and there was a zombie there and then I turned on the patio light and there was this creepy old blond-haired zombie wearing a red flannel robe. Neither of them were trying to get in because they "weren't hungry yet." I considered shooting red flannel robe guy, but was very concerned about breaking the glass on the patio window and didn't want to open the door and give him motivation to move.

Military chick came out of the bathroom, and when I woke up (when Brandon got up for work) we were trying to decide which door she could go out to smoke a cigarette... even though there were Zombies at both.

The Sacred Ceremony

2008-08-28T16:56:00.000-07:00

A Calling to the Goddess:

I call you from the depth of my soul. A depth which is purely woman. I call you from my heart which is that of a peasant’s daughter and a princess. That of an untouched virgin, a heart-full mother, and a wise grandmother.

I offer myself to you as a daughter, a sister, and a mother. I offer myself to you as a slave, a priestess, and a harlot.

I am in this moment all that I have been in a million other lifetimes. I am each thing, I am all things.

Blessed Mother, take me now and show me the chosen path, grant me my power. For I am a woman.

He looked down at her as her eyes pierced the midnight sky. Knowing that his role here was minimal. He played the role of a God. One cycle, one circle and he was to return to the earth, each day setting and relinquishing his vibrant power to her. She was the One. Her body convulsed, dew drops sliding down her soft skin, fragranced with jasmine and lily. She was so precious, so beautiful. He was honored to help her on this night, to be a link in her becoming.

Finally, her lips ceased to chant and her eyes moved to his body. Ridged with need and desire, but waiting on the brink to relinquish control. She smiled, her body turning to liquid fire against him.

“Come to me, my lord. Tonight you are the God and I am the Goddess, complete me.”

And so he did.

(C) CS

A bar-a-logue

2008-08-12T19:14:00.000-07:00

I hope y'all find this at least a little amusing. It's not as good as it could have been. You see, the first time I wrote it, and went to save it, the computer gave me the blue screen of death and so of course, I lost it. I tried again, and the second time it came out even better, and I liked it, tried to save it... and... BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH! So finally I just wrote it on a regular ol' legal pad... and it's not nearly as good as the first two times. But still- enjoy!
Love;
Cel

I'm running circles in your heart...
Oh wait- that's a different part!
That's such a big surprise;
With your cigarette breath & beer-shot eyes.
How long have you been at this bar?
It's obviously been too long by far.
You look me up and look me down,
I ain't no field and you ain't no plow.
I'm too much woman for you, hon,
And you just don't look like that much fun.
With your thumbs hitched in your too-tight jeans,
Last night's stains show they're none-to-clean.
Think you can "get you some,"
Your shirt all slopped with day-old rum.
Don't try to take me for a ride,
I swear to God you won't survive.
I'm too much woman for a man like you,
You've downed your drink and that's my cue.
I'm out the door into the night,
To find a man who fits me right.
Not some scumbag at a bar,
With a deere on his hat and a beat-up car.
Who can barely manage a 'Hey Baby,'
Much less an 'Are you Free?'
Yeah, I'm a little too much woman for you,
With places to go, and better things to do.
But don't worry, you'll be just fine,
When you're snoring at the bar by a quarter past nine.
P.S. and a Note To Self;
Blind dates really are something else...
(c) CS

Grey Eyes

2008-08-08T18:14:00.000-07:00

Grey Eyes

A cold and blustery reflection,
Was hidden in her eyes,
Lost their color, lost to dust,
Registered no surprise,
As the macabre game was played before her,
Full of gloom and gore,
And all she did was laugh and cry;
“All hail to never-more.”
What once was green had gone to grey,
Her heart, the land, the sea,
Wars waged within her soul,
And on the fields beneath.
Her hands, how they twisted,
Clenched and churned,
Watching,
As the battle built and burned.
Watching laughing with her lips,
But wishing only to be held,
As one by one,
Each captain fell.
Once the fairest of them all,
The lady of gold and green,
Lost at last to the bleak worlds,
By the reality she had seen.

© CS

Thoughts

2008-08-02T22:36:00.000-07:00

Another Life

“They” say that every person you meet and “click” with is a soul that you have known in a past life. “They” also say that every life your soul cycles through is with the purpose of learning some new lesson. Presumably this is toward the 'ultimate' goal. (Which is what?)
So, if said meeting of souls causes tension and turmoil as well as euphoria and bliss, then where the hell does that put you? Waiting for a happy medium? Does this soul lend itself positively or negatively toward your 'collective' experience points in this life?

Life is a roller coaster.

Let's ask the fairies on the subject...
What is the next step in this scenario?

Card:
“A Collective of Pixies” (# 48)

“ What is needed here is not only awareness of duty but a merry approach to it. This job has to be done, so one might as well do it willingly. Progress through this dance maze step b step- lithely and lightly. Take joy and pride in achievement. Approach the work with zeal, zest and zing – and perhapse even a little zaniness as well. Otherwise, you might as well not bother- well, almost. There is something about this lighthearted approach to your duty that is important at this time in order to achieve the results you want.
Additionally, consider the words collective and cooperative as you make your plans. This situation may take more than one person, perhaps several working together to achieve the desired results. Joining forces with others is appropriate at this time. Seek the cooperations of friends, family, coworkers, and fairies, as appropriate”

“The Fairy Oracle by Brian Froud”

Oh yes, the illusive knowledge of the fae.

Rise and Kiss the Sun

2008-06-30T00:27:00.000-07:00

Rise and kiss the sun,
Touch the rays of a new day.
A million particles of souls,
Waiting to be reborn,
The higher realm is like that,
You know.
Bask in the glory of a thousand arms,
Holding you,
loving you...
Knowing that all is connected,
Knowing what you cannot.
Rise and kiss the sun,
Knowing that she remembers,
They remember,
And they love you.
Feel the favor of the gods,
And the remembrance of Lives gone by.

(c)CS

Darkness of the Mourning

2008-06-30T00:21:00.001-07:00

Warm wash,
Is it yesterday already?
A flood of water,
Am I crying,
Or being born?
Where's the turn,
the next stop ahead?
The next...
or the next...
I've lost myself again,
In the dark cocoon,
the womb.
Is it rebirth?
Or another hollow tomb...
Have I been buried alive? In flesh or in cold dark ground...
How often have I felt,
those fingers pulling me...
twisting me out of the darkness,
Am I giving birth?
Am I being born,
Am I mourning?
Tomorrow's gotten lost,
In the darkness of the morning.

Poem XI.A

2008-06-30T00:15:00.000-07:00

This is quite awful, less inspiration, more emotion. So sorry about that.

Pulling, tugging, taking you back,
Memories with glossy black fingers,
Peeling back the curtains of your mind.
Sometimes gently prying apart edges, That are eager to be opened, Sometimes a jagged cut, As though opened with a serrated knife.
And always there's a song that goes along, Teardrops and memories, down another shot,
There's always something remind you.
Remembering stars on islands far away, When you couldn't drag your mind from home, Remembering the peace brought, By naive romance, Before knowing everything that could go wrong.
Memories, that fill you with warm, But your heart with emptiness, For they only come back when they haven't the chance, To ever live again.

Chapter Seven :: Grasping at Strings

2008-06-17T16:52:00.000-07:00

I may give up on this story soon. I feel like I'm loosing the point of it, and it's just running wherever. Let me know what you think. Also, I'm not making it look all neat and tidy, because well... I'm tired. Thirdly, Theo's speach is supposed to be italicized but I only just now realized it's not pasting that way into blogger. So sorry about that.
~C

Chapter Seven: Grasping at Strings
“I don't want to kill you...” I stood over the man, fangs extended, fingers bloodied, bits of flesh under the nails. “Please, don't make me kill you.” The man clutched at my skirt, neck bared, blood pulsing. “Drink, child, drink.” He commanded me, and his dark eyes drew me downward. I tried to pull away, knowing that one sip of his blood would make me go mad. I would kill him, and everyone else. Looking beyond him, I saw the village, my village. My family stood at the edge, fear in their eyes. The other villagers were behind them, brandishing torches and sticks.
“They don't love you, not like I do.” The man reached up and with one hand ripped into his own throat. I caught the glint of gold before the scent of his blood overcame me, and then I was on him, sucking him dry. It seemed that he died laughing.
I turned my head, saw my mother, reaching out to me, hoping to save me. There was no way to save me. I laughed and walked toward her. I would be full tonight...
*
It was the tugging at my hair, the small fingers prodding at my eyelids and the incessant chattering the awoke me. My eyes flew open to find Theo flitting about me, concern written on his face.
Not good, not good at all..no more nightmares. He settled onto a hand that I held out to him, and I could feel him shiver. He seemed more afraid than I was.
“It's alright, Theo, it was just another dream, you know we have them all the time.” I spoke out loud, hoping the sound of my voice would comfort him. In the month since I'd met Theo, I'd begun to think of him as an extension of myself. I knew that he could feel what I felt and see what I was seeing, so it hadn't shocked me when I discovered that he could read my dreams.
No, bad man, bad dreams... He flitted to the window, looking out and the curtains rustled around him. I got out of bed and followed him. The moon was just rising and the sky was darkening, everything was calm and peaceful, only the forest sounds and soft whispers from the direction of the Bathhouse disrupted the silence. I pulled the curtains the rest of the way open.
Look, Theo, it's time to get up. Night is falling, everything is fine. I set him on my shoulder in his usual spot and turned back to the room. Anyway, I'm hungry.
He would not be swayed and giving me a look of mixed concern and scorn he flitted through the keyhole on the door and was gone. I shrugged, sprites would be sprites. I opened my wardrobe, looking through the gowns and touching the fine fabrics. They still amazed me, the variety and the colors. I inhaled deeply and the scent of lavender filled my nose. Serene insisted that everything be aired with sachets of lavender, she said it brought good spirits.
I pulled out a light, sun-colored dress, I turned to close the door to the wardrobe and something caught my eye. It glittered in the darkest corner, tucked behind the skirt of a midnight blue ball gown. I reached out and my hand grasped what felt like a ball of yarn. Before I could react, I felt a tug deep in my stomach and my vision blurred.
When I opened my eyes I was in a large stone room, there were people all around me, dark skinned, like the Lady Anu. There was a dais at the end of the room and on it sat a number of people in rich clothes. They all wore gold circlets on their heads atop luxurious black hair that fell streaming down their backs. All except one. He wore a crown, gold and encrusted in rubies. His robe was a deep blue, worn over crimson breeches that looked to be silk. His eyelids were painted with gold and each had a small ruby stuck in the middle, so that when he closed his eyes one felt as though one were looking into the eyes of an effigy. There was a golden sash about his waist that secured a long broad sword and the slippers on his feet glittered with even more gems. He sat in a high backed chair and I noticed that all of the other chairs on the dais sat a good few inches lower.
There were two other kinds of people in the room. Most of them wore loin cloths, hair cut down to the very scalp, and golden bracelets that anchored them to one another. They all had identical marks on their necks, deep scratches, crusted with blood.
“They must be slaves.” I thought to myself.
The other group appeared to be guards. They wore brown tunics over full-legged pants, with sashes of maroon. They were pulling the slaves into rows, the ones whose necks seemed to be most healed were put at the front and the others toward the back.
I was standing in the center of the room. I started- surely they would notice me and punish me for my intrusion. But no one saw me. One guard walked toward me, but veered away. I walked quietly toward the dais, and still no one seemed to see me.
The guards began walking along the lines of slaves. They carried great bowls in their hands and at each slave they stopped, opening the wound in the neck with small golden-hilted knives. They let blood fill the bowls. I gasped as one by one, the slaves fell to the ground. Then, an old woman entered the room carrying a bowl herself, but the smell of cinnamon came strongly from it. To each slave she went, applying a poultice of some kind to the wounds. Their eyes fluttered and they rose to a sitting position, the blood running from their necks congealing immediately. They were gaunt and pale, but alive.
This continued all the way through the hall, until ten deep bowls were filled with blood. They were then brought to the dais. The man with the crown was given one of the large bowls. The other nine were divided amongst his peers. The guards marched back down the steps and with harsh whips drove the slaves out of the hall.
I stood, confused. Was this another society like the one Serene has created? Were the people on the dais blood-drinkers like we were? I eyed them closely. Their teeth did not extend as they drank, the color of their skin did not change. So they weren't like us, but what were they?
Suddenly, the man with the crown began to laugh, he wiped his mouth and looked straight at me, and then I recognized him. He was the man from my dream! He held out his hand to me and rose, advancing like a great cat toward its prey.
Will you share your gifts with me now, little one? His voice was a soft whisper inside my head, but it pounded against the sides of my skull with surprising force. I turned to run, but there was nowhere to go, the room was caving in on me. Then, everything went black.
*
I awoke to find Cerunnos leaning over me. Theo and Medina were fluttering about him, intent expressions on their faces. I could feel them pushing energy and light into me. Serene stood in the corner, a worried look on her face. I turned to my right to find Marguerite sitting next to me on the bed. She bent, pressing her neck against my lips. I caught the sent of jasmine before my eyes fluttered closed.
“Drink... then rest.” She pulled me into an embrace and all was still.

(c) CS

Chapter Six :: Siva Magick

2008-06-14T15:00:00.000-07:00

Don't forget to Read Ch. 5.

Chapter Six :: Siva Magick

“I don't think this is going to work.” I eyed the toad sitting in the palm of my hand warily. “You want me to talk to this?” I raised an eyebrow in Cerunnos' direction, and he laughed.

“No, little girl, I want you to speak to it. You'll learn that here, talking and speaking are very different things.”

“Either way, I don't know why you think I can do it.” I glowered down at the toad who gave me no sign of acknowledgment.

“Just close your eyes and let feel his energy through your hands. He's a simple creature, but he may hold great wisdom. Never underestimate a toad.” Cerunnos smiled and took a deep swallow from the goblet in his hand. After one more piercing look, I turned my attention to the toad. It wouldn't hurt to give it a try. Theo sat on my shoulder, playing with a strand of my hair, but I could feel his energy pulsing into me. It had taken me long enough to master the energy connection with the sprite, and Theo claimed that he belonged to my element. Now a toad?
I closed my eyes, I pushed my well of energy out toward the toad, and I waited. For long minutes I sat, feeling nothing and then a tiny shimmer of warmth started in the middle of my palm. My eyes flew open.“I felt it!” The warmth vanished and the toad croaked before hopping off my hand and across the floor. Cerunnos sighed.

“Aerveta, you are NEVER going to learn if you don't have a little patience. You can't just break the connection every time you feel a bit of energy. Remember- you have to reemerge slowly, or you're likely to hurt yourself.” He walked toward me and placed his hands over mine. “Let's try this, skin to skin, shall we?” I closed my eyes again and willed my energy up into my palms, I felt his meet mine, a coil of quick-silver dripping into my veins.

“Very good, now I want you to push your energy into me, as I'm doing to you.” He said softly, evenly, not breaking the connection. I did as he said, seeing the green tendrils of my own gift twirling up into his palms. The silver and green twisted about each other forming glowing orbs between our hands. Then, the orbs strengthened. I felt a shiver start in my toes and work it's way higher it was warm and caressing. My lips parted at the pleasure of it as my body shuddered, oh sweet release! My head fell back...

“No!” Cerunnos pulled his hands back abruptly, swaying on his feet, and then he turned on his heel and marched out of the room, Medina following him closely. I felt limp, my energy no more then a small flutter in the center of my chest.
What just happened? I asked Theo, who was still sitting on my shoulder. His energy was just as low as mine.

Siva Magick, who would have thought? I felt him giggling in my mind as he curled in the curve of my neck. I think we need a nap. I felt him close his eyes and shut down. I tried to work out the energy exchange in my mind, but it was too much and soon I followed him into the realms of slumber.

*

“Marguerite, have you ever heard of Siva Magick?” I asked. We sat in the garden and she was brushing out my hair as I leaned back into her legs. It was evening and the sun had just left the sky. So far this had become my favorite part of the day.

“I think I read about it somewhere. It wasn't part of my training, I'm a healer. I remember seeing something about it being a sensual form of the art.” She ran her fingers through my hair, pressing her lips softly against my head. “Why?”

“After practice last night, Theo said something about it.” I snuggled closer.

“ I don't know, ask Cerunnos, he's your teacher.”

“I think he may be avoiding me, I haven't seen him since our training session. Usually he takes me out when I first wake to teach me about the trees and herbs, but this afternoon I slept late.”
“Hmmm...” I had lost Marguerite, she was nibbling my neck now, having moved down to sit beside me on the grass. I took her hand, tracing the lines in the palm.
“You are no help...” but then I was lost in her embrace.

*

“Can you believe her? Pulling that on me. How long have I been here? It must be hundreds upon hundred of years now, to be caught off guard like that by a novice!” Cerunnos paced in front of Serene, who sat, holding a purring white cat in her lap. She was dressed simply, a lilac colored gown that ran to her calves with a silver belt secured about her hips.

“It's been three hundred and forty-four and a half years, if you want to know. My you're still just a baby!” She laughed at the glare he turned her way, “You know that we need some one with power, and you know that Sivas have more power than you and I combined. We can not afford for you to avoid her just because she makes you uncomfortable. If we don't harness that power, and teach her to control it, it will get out of control as her other skills develop. You know that. We've already turned her, there's no going back, and a blood witch with that kind of power could cause more trouble than the Imperial Highness, his troops and his demons combined!” Serene sat forward, a serious look in her eyes.

“Can't you transfer her to Vrita or Anu? I'm sure they'd be more capable of dealing with her!” Cerunnos rested his forehead against the stone wall.
“You know perfectly well that they're both busy. What's more, Vrita knows wind, and she knows it well. Anu knows fire like no other. But only you, my dear, have any experience with Siva Magick.” Serene rose, patting him on the arm.

“I can't control it, you know what happened with Eva!” His hands clenched.

“I know, but you're the only person who can save her...” Serene slipped on a pair of silver satin slippers and walked to the door, “... don't make my turning her a mistake.”

(c) CS

Chapter Five :: Winds of Anger

2008-06-14T14:59:00.000-07:00

A Short One for you!

Chapter Five :: Winds of Anger

Vrita stood, surveying the land. Her blue robes twisted and twirled about her, although the air was stiff and hot. The armies were camped below her, flags hanging limp at the top of road-stained tents. She watched quietly as the men laughed and joked about their latest conquests. A few were still in their tents, forcing their sweat drenched skin against her people. She paused.

“They aren't my people anymore...” she whispered quietly to herself. It was true, these were the same people that had thrown her out of her village, claiming her to be a witch. Until Serene had taken her in, she had wandered, lost and afraid for many moons. Still, she did not take kindly to how the the Imperial Highness was treating them. Not just them, all of the seven tribes.

Her eyes picked out the enclosure in the middle of the camp. There were women and girls of all ages, strung together like cattle and chained to tall poles. All in various states of undress, their skin blistering in the hot sun. Anger rippled through her body and her robes danced with more vigor. Perhaps she could not end this slavery herself, but she could certainly make things interesting. Her violet eyes darkened as she drew an orb from her robe. She looked into it deeply and the clear crystal began to swirl, clouds came, twisting and twirling, begging to be free. She looked up at the sky.

“Lord Mayhem, a shower if you please...” She was answered by a rumble of thunder that sounded suspiciously like laughter and then the rain drops started to pour. She closed her eyes and pushed her energy into the orb, it left her hands, spinning and twirling. She joined in the dance, giving her body up to the serpent goddess.

The orb elongated, it no longer seemed to be made of crystal, but of the wind itself, and then it burst into thousands of little pieces that fell, shrieking down on the camp below. Vrita smiled to herself as she heard the screams of men as they scrambled to keep their tents from flying away. Looking down, she saw the women, arms stretched up, mouths open, welcoming the rain.
“You will be free.” She said and turned away, fangs bared, it was time to feed.

The Sensitive Woman

2008-06-09T22:25:00.000-07:00

Paint and Ink

2008-06-06T00:46:00.000-07:00

I am by no means a good artist, but occasionally I enjoy dabbling.

Sleeping Pills

2008-05-28T18:08:00.001-07:00

Closed eyes, calm breath,
Then a heart-wrenching flutter of awake.
Is it too quiet? Is the dawn too dark?
Utter stillness, waiting to feel the tremors.
Seconds pass, that seem like minutes.
The fear clutches longingly at heartstrings.
Only to be pushed back by the sigh of relief,
At the sound of a quiet, pensive breath.

(c)cs

Lullaby

2008-05-25T17:06:00.000-07:00

Be Calm, Be Quiet,

I love you my dear,

Quiet your head,

And calm all your fears.

The night is watching,

The moon shines bright,

The Goddess will guard you

All through the night.

optional addition:

Be Calm, Be Quiet,

The night is not long,

Fairies dance in your dreams,

Singing love songs.

Rest your head softly now,
Be not afraid,
Mother will watch you,
Until it is day.

Chapter Four :: The First Lesson

2008-05-14T22:59:00.000-07:00

Another chapter! I know you've been missing it! This is not one of the best, and it's a bit short, but my 'sprite' has gone astray! Woah, and I just now realized it's been exactly 2 months since my last post for this story. How sad... :-(

Chapter Four :: The First Lesson
There was something whispering along my cheeks and fluttering near my ears. A horsefly most likely, just waiting to take a chunk of my cheek for its own. I swatted at it, and satisfied, rolled over, allowing myself to be tugged back into the safe arms of sleep. A shrill cry caught me on the edge though, forcing my eyes open.
I was confronted by what looked like a tiny, silver human. A female human. She was nude, about the height of my hand and had her hands on her hips, staring at me accusingly. Her eyes were silver as were her wings. The only other color showing on her body was a blue belt around her waist, that matched the shade of her lips.
She gave me one more glare and fluttered away from the bed. Only then did I notice Cerunnos sitting off to the side in a well padded wing backed chair. I glared at him as the small creature hovered near his shoulder, chattering frantically in his ear. After hearing her out he nodded and laughed before turning to me.
“It is good to see you awake, Aerveta. It would appear that other than the energy drain, you are no worse for your evening. I probably should have tested you first, before including you in a ritual, but it just seemed so perfect...” he reached to his side and pulled forth a small tray with a goblet on it. “ Drink this and then we can go down to the bathhouses and make sure you're full. I have a feeling that today will be quite the experience for you. I'll meet you outside when you're ready.” I watched him leave, noting that he had changed since last evening and now wore simple black breaches and an open black shirt, revealing a thick gold chain around his neck.
I drank down the cool blood in the glass. It was not so filling as when fresh out of a body. I shuddered at the thought. It would take some getting used to. Climbing slowly out of bed, noting the tension in my body, I went to the wardrobe and withdrew a simple brown dress. Were it not for the delicate stitching, and the soft cloth, it could have been something my mother would have made. I held it close to my face imagining her smell mixing with the feel of sunlight on the skin. Then I pulled it on. There was no time for moping.
*
As promised, Cerrunos was waiting for me in the garden. Although the sun was shining, he seemed to take no notice. Instead, he was staring intently into a fountain, his lips moving quietly. I peered around him, and for a moment, swore I saw an image. Then, he turned to me and the fountain smoothed before the water returned to its normal rippling pattern.
`“You're ready then? Marguerite did say she took you yesterday, so you know how the bathhouse works?” He offered his arm as I nodded silently. “After you have bathed, we will go back to my rooms and begin your training. Lightly, at first, as it may be a bit much, but soon you'll be the best of them.” His eyes twinkled, but I couldn't tell if it was with greed or mirth.
In the bathhouse, Josephine again undressed me and allowed me to drink my fill. She pinned my hair up gently and washed my limbs, massaging out the coils of muscle. Cerrunos, meanwhile had a young man rubbing him down with a musky, wood scented oil in a far corner. His eyes were unfocused, but again his lips were moving silently. I wondered what he could be doing. The young man touched him on the shoulder and gave him an admonishing look, before sitting him up and allowing him to feed. They then sat together talking, like old friends, their muscles glistening in the golden light.
Josephine followed my stare. “Master Cerrunos is and impressive man,” she said, watching me for a reaction, “You are lucky to have such a teacher. It's been too long since he's had anyone but harlots in his chambers.” She preened herself, suggesting that she may have been one of those harlots.
“I just wish I understood why I'm here, and what I'm meant to be learning...” I closed my eyes, trying to make sense of all the events that had taken place in the past few days. Josephine's hands traced circles on my back, more sensual than therapeutic.
“You'll find it out, sweet one, she sighed into my ear, before pushing me against the side of the tub.”
*
“Stop glaring at her, she's here to help you. If you can open up your mind to Medina, then that will be the first step in determining where your strongest skills lie.” Any relaxation that Cerrunos had gleaned from the bathhouse was quickly dissipating as I watched.
“She isn't a bug! Don't swat at her!” Medina had flown about behind my head and I was trying to fight the impulse to send her flying through the air. She flew back in front of me and gazed into my eyes. I felt myself falling into the silver depths of hers and then pulled myself upright. She made a tutting sound under her breath and flew to Cerrunos' shoulder, whispering frantically to him.
“Medina says that wind may not be your strong point, and that we should bring Theo out.” He sighed dramatically, “I had so hoped you would be an air.”
We had been in his chambers for little more than an hour and in that time I had learned that the small creature called Medina was a sprite and then in order to learn my other lessons, I would need to be able to commune with the sprites. From Cerunnos' most recent comment, I gleaned that sprites were somehow related to the elements, but what that had to do with me was yet unknown.
Cerrunos returned from an adjoining room with a small brown shape curled in his hand. Upon closer inspection, I saw that it was a nude man, Medina's size, but with a green belt, green wings, and green lips. All of the rest of him was as brown as the mud in mother's garden. Medina gave him a disgusted look before floating down and prodding him in the side with her toe. She appeared to be speaking but all I could hear were a series of shrill notes. Theo, for that's who I assumed the new sprite was, opened first one brown eye and then the other. He sat up and laughed, singing shrill notes back to Medina, before she flew back up to Cerunnos' shoulder in a huff. Then he rose, stretched and took flight, slowly working his way across the room to me. After a few spins and somersaults in air, he hovered in front of my face and smiled brilliantly, before waving.
“Aerveta, this is Theo. Now, let's try the same exercise, close your eyes and take a few deep breaths and then open them. Look into Theo's eyes and allow him to speak to you. In time, you may learn their language, but until then, all communications must be carried on inside your mind.” I did as he said, steadying my breathing, closing my eyes. When I opened them, Theo was staring at me kindly. We looked at each other for awhile, as I tried to wipe my mind clean.
“Hello Aerveta.” It was sudden, and as clear as if he had been whispering in my ear, but somehow I knew it was in my head. I jumped, knocking over the stool I had been sitting on, and Theo flew back to Cerunnos. He landed on the shoulder Medina was on and took her in his arms. She glared at him but stayed in his embrace. I stared at him in awe. Had he actually spoken to me?
“Very good, little girl. You've done an excellent job. Now, Medina and I have some things we must accomplish today, I'm going to leave you here with Theo, perhaps you two can carry on a proper conversation!” Cerunnos turned and was gone, as Theo fluttered down from his shoulder and toward me.
I sighed, and held out my hand. This was going to be an interesting life.

(c) CS

Uncouth, Disrespectful, Uncalled for.

2008-05-03T16:19:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time,
Or was it "in the beginning?"
One can never really be sure...
Things came fluttering & flashing,
Into existence.
Though I walk through the valley of,
The shadow of death,
I fear only my curiosity,
For flying monkeys really do-
Add some perspective.
And I study the great works,
Merely to contradict them,
Then, in turn, to whisk my mind,
To other corners of the world.
Verily, I say unto thee,
Walk a path of righteousness,
Or eat chocolate and cakes,
For they are much sweeter,
Than guilty do-goods.
I believe I would be off to 'Hell,'
If I felt it was more than just...
An orb of hear-say,
Concocted by old men,
With fear in their hearts.
If it were true, it would be,
Quite overrun, I imagine,
By the ever- wagging tongues,
Of matriarchs.

(c) CS

Crazy Mind Games

2008-04-03T16:40:00.001-07:00

I wrote this in 2005, for a school mythology assignment none-the-less. I'm looney. I don't even know.... I'll write some new stuff soon, promise. My past self just tickles me pink...
Cast:
Zeus: Bush
Hera: Barbara Walters
Hestia: Martha Stewart
Demeter: Dolly Parton
Poseidon: Sadaam Hussein
Hephaestus: Alberto Gonzales
Ares: Osama Bin Laden
Aphrodite: Paris Hilton
Athena: Hilary Clinton
Hermes: Dr. Phil
Apollo: Mel Gibson
Artemis: Condoleezza Rice
Hades: Bill Gates
Dionysus: Garfield – as in the cat

Intro: So it was, that on the twenty-first day of June in the year 2005 that a gathering occurred. A gathering of the most unique and, perhaps, most disturbing kind. A gathering of people so influential and so egotistical that they believed that they had the power to control the universe. They called themselves “The Triumph.”

These fourteen individuals joined together with their underlings, those devoted to them in a life of servitude so that they might contemplate how to more thoroughly infiltrate the media, and by default, the world with propaganda and hypocrisy. President George W. Bush leading up the group, sitting at the head of a large mahogany table idly counting the number of toothpicks in the toothpick dispenser. Barbara Walters, his secret wife and cohort in the infiltration of media sources. Next to Barbara sat Martha Stewart, reorganizing the centerpiece. Farther down the table came Dolly Parton, who was still not sure why she was here, Sadaam Hussein who was gleeful discussing war with his brother and partner in crime, Osama Bin Laden. Alberto Gonzales sat listening to them talk quietly, taking notes While Paris Hilton started longingly down the table at Mel Gibson and Hilary Clinton discussed psychological issues with Dr. Phil. Condoleezza Rice was steadily edging closer to the conversation between Osama and Sadaam, trying to get a bit of information, and Bill Gates was carefully planning a way to store human souls in his zippy2010 laptop. Finally, at the foot of the table, Garfield set, his fat rolls drifting off the chair and swigged a bottle of chardonnay, waiting for the meeting to be called to order. And so they were assembled.
Bush: Alright then, I guess we’d better get this shin dig called to order. Is everyone here?Barbara: (pulling out a notepad) I’m going to need you all to speak clearly and concisely so I can take notes.
Bill Gates: (pulling out an older version of his laptop) Here, Barbara, this model is far better equipped for your note taking than that primitive notepad.
Barbara: Thanks Bill.
Bush: Now, as we know, we have a world to take over, a humanity to ruin, and weapons of mass destruction to fabricate. Sadaam! Osama! What on EARTH are you doing? Did I not tell you to leave the explosive devices outside the meeting hall?
Osama: Oops, sorry Dad. We forgot. Sadaam, take them out in the hall.
Sadaam: Why should I have to? You should do it.
Osama: No, dude, it’s not my problem.
Sadaam: It’s not my problem either.
Bush: Okay, leave them alone, it’s not as though anyone really cares if we all get blown to smithereens anyway. Now, we need to plan a coordinated attack on China so we can enslave their citizens and force them to build more synthetic goods to make our nation the top producers of necessary goods in the words. Paris, what are you doing?
Paris: Filing my nails.
Bush: Is that a DAWG in my meeting room?
Paris: It’s only Fifi! Come here Fifi!
Bush: What the hell is that dawg doing in my meeting room?
Paris: Fifi goes everywhere with me. Hmph.
Bush: Back to the business at hand, again. Dr. Phil, do you have any ideas as to how we can brain wash the leaders of China into leading their citizens on over here.
Dr. Phil: Why sure, we’ll just give them happy tee-shirts that say “Walk to America” and then my wife and I will lead them across the Pacific Ocean!
Bush: Phil, have you considered seeking psychiatric help? Because from all that I can see, you’re an idiot.
Hilary: If I may speak, what if we encouraged the Chinese to come here under the ploy that we were giving them a nice place to stay while we were boosting their economy and redesigning their country?
Martha: I’ll redesign their country! I got some great silk drapes in the other day, and a few well-placed fruit bowls will have their country looking just super.
Paris: And some pink boas too!
Alberto: Sir, I would suggest we just gather up our troops, put them in huge armored vehicles (transitional between water and land, of course) and take the country by force.
Osama: Yeah, Dad, or we could just run a plane into their most prominent cities.
Sadaam: Or we could just blow them up.
Bush: Osama, I let you try the plane trick once, and you got the wrong country, I don’t think I’d trust you pioneering a jet again. Sadaam, you don’t have any weapons, so how do you propose we blow them up?
Condoleezza: Well we’re going to have to figure out how to take them over somehow. I mean, honestly, Mr. Bush. We can’t let them continue to govern themselves freely or they might come up with the same world-wide brain-washing scheme we have!
Alberto: She has a point! We must take action. We can’t blow them up like a bunch of idiots, that would let the other countries in on our motives.
Sadaam: Oh! So you’re saying my ideas are bad are you?!?
Osama: Of course he’s saying your ideas are bad, mine are much better.
Bush: Okaaay boys, calm down.
Martha: Would you like a pretzel, Mr. Bush?
Bush: A pretzel? (he turns pale) Why, no thank you Martha.
Dolly: Well y’all, I don’t know what I’m doing here. Come on Paris, honey let’s go back to Pigeon Forge, I got some of my new rides in.
Paris: Alright (Dolly and Paris exit.)
Bill: Well now that the ditzy fake blondes are gone; I have designed an underground lair, complete with fire, brimstone, and a burning river. How about, we send all those who are resistant to brain washing down there. I can watch over them via a set of well-placed cameras and they’ll just think they’ve died and are burning in Hell.
Bush: Now that ain’t a bad idea, Bill.
Mel: Well that’s not all together right, everyone deserves a chance to be saved! Why not build a sanctuary in the sky? Where everyone can be happy together! Of course, none of YOU will be saved, because you’re not as pure as I am, you didn’t depict yourself pounding a nail into your poor savior’s hand.
Bush: Lovely sentiments, Mel. Boys, remove him.
(Sadaam and Osama propel the still babbling Mel from the room.)
Bush: Now, can we get back to business?
Garfield: (burp) Alright, well this was fun, I’m out of here.
Martha: My turkey is in the oven! I forgot about it!
Dr. Phil: I have a show in half an hour, I need to get my makeup done.
Bush: Fine, meeting dismissed. (to Osama and Sadaam) You boys better go back to your respective mountain caves.
Sadaam: But daaaad, I wanted to torture the jailers for a little longer in my cell.
Bush: Fine, just stay out of trouble, you two, I’ve already dealt with you enough.

Conclusion: And so the second summit meeting of ‘The Triumph’ was disbanded much as the first, with everyone going their separate ways, and nothing being accomplished.

Chapter Three :: An Unexpected Dance.

2008-03-14T15:18:00.000-07:00

Chapter Three : An Unexpected Dance

The ball room was a sight to behold. Maroon and gold tapestries danced down the wall, swaying in some invisible breeze. The room was warm and smelled of wine and laughter. I stepped forward and was immediately pulled into a throng of bodies. Marguerite's hand reached back and gripped mine.

“It's alright, I've got you, you'll learn to love this, but it does take some getting used to!” We spun off into the room, Marguerite laughing with glee. I was overwhelmed by the swishing of fine fabrics and the wafting scents of exotic oils. I gazed in awe at the fine lords and ladies before me. So many skin tones, so many shades of fabric.

My eyes were caught up by a tall beautiful, dark skinned woman wearing crimson robes tied with a wide silver sash. Her eyelashes were tinged with silver and diamond droplets shown in her hair. She wore silver sandals on her feet and silver, diamond studded anklets. She turned and caught my glance, laughing lightly before dancing off with an equally tall pale-skinned partner.

“That's Lady Anu, she's one of Serene's most prized friends and is charged with many elemental duties. Ah, but you haven't reached that point of your training yet, so I'll try not to confuse you. She is by far one of the sweetest ladies that you'll meet in your time here. That over there is the man we affectionately call 'Lord Mayhem' the name has stuck, and I doubt that many but Serene recall what his real name is. He's always the life of the party, but more often than not he's also a cause of upset. Still, I think he amuses Serene, and thus is still allowed on the grounds” I looked over at a short, plump man. His hair was dark and slicked back, at least what I could see of it beneath a ridiculously large purple top hat perched jauntily atop his head. He was wearing a purple tunic over a pair of black breeches and he had bangles of all varieties around his wrists, his eyes were darkly smudged and he had large dots of rouge on his cheeks.

“Why, he's just like a court jester!” I laughed softly.

“Perhaps in another life, indeed!” Marguerite grabbed my arms and spun me away. We stopped in front of a large dais and looking up I saw Serene in all of her finery. She was wearing a deep purple gown, run through with silver and diamonds. The bodice was tight, accenting her slender form and the skirt blossomed about her like a flower greeting the morning. Her hair was piled atop her head in what I could only assume was the latest fashion and festooned with purple morning glories, kept open by some magical means. At her neck was a simple silver band with odd runes inscribed upon it. She held out her hand to me.

“I do hope you're enjoying yourself Aerveta, I know this is ever so much to take in so quickly. I wanted you to see that we are not cold-blooded killers, we are good hearted people. In time you will learn our true purpose, and how we help the humans, and then perhaps you will not only accept, but embrace this new shape. Now, this is far too much serious talk, go out and mingle, enjoy, drink the wine.” She lifted her own glass to her lips and winked at me as Marguerite ushered me away. She led me to a table filled with glasses of dark red wine and some sort of gold liquid that I was nervous to try. I had not forgotten my water and bread experience from a few days past.

“I'll be right back!” Marguerite giggled and was swept away, into the arms of a tall silver haired man who clasped his hands about her waist and twirled her through the air. I parked myself next to the table and grabbed a glass, musing over the swirling liquid. Surely, if I looked entranced in my drink no one would bother me...

“Well hello there, little girl,” The voice was low and warm against my ear as my hair shifted, “you look lost.” I spun around, narrowly avoiding spilling the burgundy wine down my dress. I didn't care for the wine, but I held it close and drank it frantically, hoping for a retreat from reality. I didn't know if alcohol worked on our minds like it did on normal people, but I hoped. I eyed the man standing behind me warily.

He was a half a foot taller than me, light of complexion with dark hair the curled and few inches below his ears. He smiled at me, knowingly and I felt the first pangs of light headed laughter that come with alcohol.

“Yes, it does work on us as well, a rather unfortunate downfall for many of our kind. You can't live being a drunk, Aerveta, and living is where all of the excitement is!” He laughed and as my body swayed he swept me up in his arms. We swirled across the room and his eyes fixed on mine. I could feel him prodding about in my brain, what answers was he looking for? Soon, the colors in the room began to sway and melt together, I fell into the dance and it took over my soul.

Then, I suddenly was aware that I was hovering 15 feet above the dance floor, still clasped in the arms of this dark haired stranger. Gravity pulled on my body but he held me closer and kept me suspended in mid air, my heart thudding with panic.

“Shhh, little one, you're fine, just let yourself get lost in the music. Oh, I don't believe I've mentioned my name, I'm Cerunnos,” He let go of me for a moment and as my mind spun he did an elaborate bow in mid air, “And the pleasure is all mine.” He lifted me up again and we were twirling and spinning to music that I could only hear in my head.
Hours later, or perhaps it was mere minutes, as I allowed Cerunnos to carry my weight through the gilded hall and occasionally out to the gardens and amongst the stars, I noticed a change happening. The light in the hall was steadily becoming more purple, I felt as though I were descending into a cave of pure amethyst as the candles lost their golden-orange color.
“

Now, Aerveta, this is where the fun begins.” The instrumentalists below packed up their things and a deep throbbing tone vibrated throughout the room. I looked around for the source.

“Ah now, no questions, just feel.” His hands slid down my back to my waist and he proceeded to lift me slowly. I noticed that other couples were beginning odd dances, some animal and ritualistic, some smooth and touching. The music continued, slow and rhythmic, many deep notes, with a river of higher, bird like notes flowing around them. I let my body go as Cerunnos ran his hands over it, manipulating me into each move of the dance. The candles changed to blue and green then back to purple. Sashes were falling through the air and I registered a brief surprise to see that some couples were disrobing. The lady named Anu was wrapped in her partner's arms, chocolaty skin catching the light. I felt my sash give way.
I looked to my right and saw Marguerite dancing through the air like a forest sprite, naked as the day she was born and giggling as her partner chased her. A fear registered in my heart, I didn't want all of these people to see me in my entirety, to see my flaws. I tried to pull away from Cerunnos' intoxicating dance.

“Don't worry, little girl, moon clad is not on our agenda for this evening. However, all of these layers of fabric are going to disrupt your natural energy flow. So down to your under things it is. With a final twist of his wrist my dress fell away. I looked over at him and only then did I realize that the whole evening he'd been wearing deer-skin breeches and a simple white tunic. He was the only man at the ball who wasn't adorned in jewels and make up. No bright colors, no baubles of any kind. He smiled at me.

“I have my own way of doing things.” He gripped my hand and slowly we began floating down to where a circle was forming 5 feet off the floor. He positioned us next to Marguerite and she gripped my free hand in hers. Leaning over me she whispered to Cerunnos.

“Ah, so you have found her suiting. The great master takes an apprentice. It's about time, we could use more of your type around here.” Cerunnos smiled and put a finger to his lips.

“Not now, Marguerite, don't overwhelm her. But yes, I think that she is the one.” With that he grasped the hand of the young woman on his other side and a deep silence fell about the room. Looking across the circle I saw that Serene was standing directly across from Cerunnos. Lady Anu was across from a pale skinned man whose hair was so blond it was nearly white. Most of the people in the circle were dressed in nothing but their jewels, but there were a few like Cerunnos and I that had remained in simple clothing, underthings, tunics, breeches. I assumed that these were things that wouldn't 'interrupt the flow of energy.'

Serene opened her mouth and started chanting in a language that was unknown to me. After a few moments, Cerunnos joined her, harmoniously melding his own chant with hers. Then, lady Anu began and finally the pale man. These four continued for many minutes and I noticed a pulsating light rising from the middle of the circle. Marguerite squeezed my hand and soon everyone in the circle was chanting along. I didn't know the words, but I hummed the tune. I felt that I had to be part of whatever was happening. The aura in the center of the circle began to take on form. First it was a swan, swimming in circles, keening for its love. Then it changed to a great cat, pouncing on an unknown target. It circled around through many animals, and I noticed that each animal would face a specific person and that person would bow their head as though in appreciation. Each animal sent out a tendril of color to their chosen person, leaving that person glowing. At Marguerite, the light turned into a small humming bird, buzzing about sipping nectar out of flowers we couldn't see. It sent pink light to her and she laughed lovingly before bowing her head. Then, it chose Cerunnos and a great black bear rose from the light. It pulled itself up on its hind legs and let out a great roar before sending a dark thread of light to Cerunnos. He bowed his head. After a time everyone had received a light from their animal except for me. I could feel all eyes upon me, waiting, expecting. Finally, the boiling light in the center of the circle turned toward me, melding and bubbling. Many times it began to take a form but then fell back into a pool of mixed colors. Finally, it gathered itself up and came speeding toward me. I felt Marguerite tense in shock as she dropped my hand, just before the full force of the light hit me. Then, all was dark.

Lead Me Not

2008-03-08T19:38:00.000-08:00

I had though myself once, a great lover,
With passion and angst to spare,
But it seems to me that now I want nothing,
More than loving arms to be there.

For passion is less than a lifetime,
And lifetimes are lost without love.
It seems easy to forget, until you've forgot,
What it is your heart really dreams of.

Given not to walking down paths of intrigue,
But rather a path of warmth and light.
To hold in one's heart the forever-truth,
To never give up without a fight.
© Clair Smith

Chapter Two:: The Bathhouse.

2008-03-08T19:30:00.000-08:00

Per Usual, ignore any errors. Someone once said that girls don't have as big of imaginations as boys... that someone might have been full of shit...:-) Enjoy, chapter 3 is coming. Thanks for the inspiration.

Chapter 2 – The Bathhouse
We arrived at a place I didn't know. It seemed to be made of vines and great mounds of rock. But by now I was too sad, too tired to care. Serene led me through passages of stone and finally through a firm oak door, into a small bedchamber. Despite it's small size, it was the most elegant room I had ever been in. The sheets on the bed were green satin and the comforter was stuffed with goose feathers, and covered with delicate egg-shell colored material. I fell into it without exploring further and slept deeply, dreaming of home.
I awoke in late afternoon. The sun hung at a sleepy slant. There were garments laid out for me, but they were too complex for me to put on by myself, so I chose a green silk robe, and slipping quietly out the door went for a walk. I snaked through many corridors, solid rock walls, decorated with what I could only assume was the work of great artists. Finally, I found a door to the outside. The sun hit me startlingly, and though its warmth meant nothing to me I was glad for its presence.
I was in a beautiful garden. It was full of vibrant colors and flowers that I couldn't even name. My heart was suddenly filled with happiness. My knees buckled and I feel to the ground, and unbearable heaviness on my chest. So this was what too much happiness was. I gasped for breath, and got to my feet and staggered toward a stone-paved path between two trees. Once in the shade I felt better, more at home. I found a stone bench, off the beaten path, nestled neatly in an alcove of shrubs and vines. I rested there, turning my eyes to the canopy above me, enjoying the sun dappled view. This was much better, I could bear this. It was simply contentedness. I pressed my hands into the folds of my robe, loving the sweetness of the silk, allowing the sensations to seep into my skin. I could feel things, enjoy them. It was just slow going. I ran my hands through my hair, trying to break apart some the tangles that had come from days of disregard. I gave up and the curls snaked around each other, with unending twists, turns and snares. I closed my eyes, leaning back on the bench.
I came to consciousness aware that there was a presence near me. I didn't want company, I didn't want to meet any more of these strange people. I tried to fight my way back into dreamland, to remain asleep, perhaps it would leave. It was impossible though, like Serene, the presence had known I was awake, nearly before I did. I sighed and heard a tinkly giggle. Like a thousand little bells chiming together, dancing in the wind. I opened my eyes.
“Ah good, I thought perhaps you were going to continue pretending.” The girl sitting next to me was petite of frame and fair of skin. She had fiery hair that reached her shoulders and spun out about her like the rays of the sun. Her eyes were green and cat-like, peering at me with intelligence and humor.
“Marguerite.” She held her hand out to me and I took it, shocked once again by how cool her skin was. “You're the new girl Serene brought in, aren't you? What was your name... ah yes, Aerveta, pretty name. Anyway, you're lucky that Serene took you under her wing... you might have ended up with one of the other sisters, and they're not nearly as nice.” She giggled again and her little nose scrunched up with mirth. She was wearing a dark green dress that matched the dusk-clad foliage all around us. It was a simple dress, unlike the dress Serene had left for me back in the room. It was long, and had a yellow sash at the waist. I eyed it with envy.
“Ah yes, you have to create your own style. Serene will try to dress us up all like perfect little dolls if she can, but if you tell her you'd like simpler clothing, she will provide.” Marguerite laughed again, “Come along then, you're going to be hungry, and I can help you feed in the easiest of ways.” She pulled on my hand.
“But how... how are you so happy?” I asked, shocked. I remembered what Serene had said about happiness and how unattainable it was.
“Oh, love, you know. I was just lucky enough to fall for one of us...” she trailed off and looked away, and then pulled me along the path, “come on now, you need to feed before you go crazy.”
She led me into what looked like a bath house, there were deep pools ,steaming gently, and beautiful floral scents. Everything was done up in white and green and gold. There were lounging couches and piles of silky robes, like my own, scattered about. But what really struck me was the smell of warm human flesh. My tongue ran along my teeth and my hands clenched and unclenched.
“Now, Aerveta, I'm going to teach you about the bath house and you must listen carefully, we don't want anything bad to happen.” She stepped forward and drew one of the naked women who had been wandering about forward. The woman had long, shining brown hair, and on her arms she wore golden armlets depicting serpents, her legs had simple gold anklets. Her eyelids, too were painted in gold. She came toward me and smiled before taking my hand and drawing me toward the pool. Marguerite drifted along beside us. I wanted nothing more than to drain this beautiful woman dry... and smell of blood was overpowering me now and I felt my resistance weakening.
“Ah, no, you mustn't hurry through it, it will ruin the enjoyment of the experience. I know it's going to be hard, but once you start feeding, you must stop when I tell you to stop, or you will be severely punished by Serene, and it's never pleasant when she punishes you.” We had reached the edge of one of the scented, steaming pools. Another attendant came and helped Marguerite out of her dress. The brown haired woman undid the sash on my robe and pulled it back over my shoulders. I stood very still, I feared that one little movement would send me at her throat, or worse, her heart, ruining her beautiful life force. She then drew me into the pool, Marguerite was next to me, receiving the same treatment from her attendant. She smiled at me and the attendant ran her fingers over Marguerite's arms.
“Now, Josephine, “ Marguerite leaned over toward my attendant, “I will watch her, I won't let her hurt you.” Josephine nodded, rubbing my shoulders. Her eyes stayed at her business, and she showed no concern. I wanted to shake her and remind her that I wanted to drain her blood. At that moment though, she smiled knowingly at me and bared her neck. Marguerite smiled at me.
“Go ahead, Aerveta, gently though, like you were kissing a lover. It is against our code to take willing blood for granted. Sip gently, as though this were the finest of wines, you will never go hungry while in this house, you have no need to gorge yourself.” She gestured with her long slender fingers toward Josephine's throat. Josephine sighed gently and although I hated myself for wanting it so badly, I pressed my lips against her skin. I sucked gently, letting my teeth pierce the skin. The first taste of her blood was exquisite, and I wanted more. I tasted again, and beautiful fantasies danced through my mind. I could feel the new blood rushing to my cheeks in a blush. Such things I had never thought! I sucked harder and Josephine gasped gently but didn't pull away. Marguerite's hand pulled gently at my shoulders.
“That will do for now, young one.” She smiled and handed Josephine a glass of wine from the side of the pool. Josephine drank it down and then smiled at me and took my hand pulling me to the other side of the pool. Marguerite was now feeding on her attendant, slipping through the water like lovers. Josephine leaned my head back, and poured a dipper of water over it, then she slowly began cleaning my hair with a sweet smelling herbal water, gently pulling out the knots. I sighed and relaxed. Once she had finished, she washed the rest of my down, massaging my shoulders.
Once I was relaxed, and Marguerite had undergone the same treatment, the two attendants led us out of the water and wrapped us in warm robes. I was startled to find myself enjoying the warmth. Marguerite winked at me.
“Serene has a gift...” she said sleepily and we were escorted to two lounging couches where we lulled about, eyes half closed.
“Will I be here forever then?” I asked Marguerite.
“After you've been initiated, you may choose to stay or leave. You may choose to renounce us, or to always choose this as your home base. Most travel but return here eventually. We've only lost 3 to the other Sisters.” She yawned. I wondered who these sisters she kept referring to were, but I was too tired to ask.
“When we wake, you may feed again, and then there will be dancing in the great hall...” She trailed off and I felt myself getting sucked away into a dream.
I dreamt of my mother, holding my hand and leading me through the forest. We were running and laughing like little girls, but then it started to get dark. She looked up at the sky worriedly.
“I have to leave you here now Aerveta, the forest is where you belong, you are its child.” Then she turned and disappeared among the trees. I tried to call out to her, to follow her, but my voice was lost and the woods were changing on me. Then, in the distance I heard a scream and I was running toward it and arrived just in time to see a great wolf loping off through the woods, with my mother in his mouth. I opened my mouth and screamed.
Someone grabbed my arm, shaking me gently. I opened my eyes and looked into Serene's night-blue eyes. She lifted me as though I weighed nothing and held me in her arms, rocking.
“It wasn't true. Your mother is fine, I've made sure of that. No harm shall come to your family. The dreams will continue though.” She sighed. “Aerveta, do you know who the wolf in your dream is?” I shook my head, trembling, tears pricking my eyes.
“It was you. We are all plagued with the fear of hurting our families now. We are the predators, just as the wolf and the tiger, the bear and the hawk. You have to learn to accept it as part of yourself, and control it.” She hugged me close again and then let go.
“Now, we have a dance to attend.” She held up a white dress, not so simple as Marguerite's earlier, but simpler that Serene's own garment. “Marguerite told me that perhaps you might not wish to have such elaborate clothing.” She then helped me dress, finally tying my hair up in a red ribbon that matched the red sash on the dress. She kissed me on both cheeks and then walked out of the door.
“Seth will be up shortly so that you might feed and he will escort you to the dance.”
Seth turned out to be a boy, not much older than me. He was robustly built, and carried with him a decanter of wine. I eyed it longingly, but knew it wasn't for me. He bowed to me.
“At your service, mistress. Serene says you are new to the feeding game, so I will make sure that you don't loose yourself.” He wrapped his arms around me gently and bared his neck, I followed the same procedure I had with Josephine earlier. I drunk deeply, again awed by the feelings I hadn't felt before. Then his arms tightened around me, and twining his hand in my hair, he gently pulled my head back. At first a bright anger bloomed in my mind, but then my eyes cleared and I saw him smiling gently at me. When he saw that I had returned to sanity, he handed me a square of silk to wipe my mouth.
“Still a little messy.” He laughed, “You'll get the hang of it soon enough.” Then he opened the decanter of wine and poured himself a glass. “Now, my lady, I must escort you to the ball.” He helped me slip smooth red satin slippers on my feet and then led me through a maze of halls to a great ballroom. There, he turned and bowed.
“But, where are you going?” I asked. The room was full of beautiful people but I didn't know them and I was afraid.
“I am going to the servant's quarters to have dine.” He patted my arm gently. “You'll do fine.” With that, he turned and disappeared down the corridor.
I entered the ball room tentatively, as people swirled around me, but before I knew it, Marguerite was at my side.
“Don't be afraid, little Aerveta, you're going to have a grand time.” She smiled slyly and led me further in.
(C) Clair Smith

Coming soon... Chapter 3::And Unexpected Dance...

A Witch of Blood :: Chapter 1 ~ Asleep Under the Oak

2008-02-05T01:31:00.000-08:00

Disclaimer: With B's Encouragement, I've decided to post the first chapter of the novel (potentially novella, depending on when I run outa fuel...) Know that I'm completely embarrassed of my work. This has been proofed twice, but who even knows what's wrong with it! So be gentle with me...

Chapter One- Asleep Under the Oak
I was born Aerveta (air-va-ta) Thornweaver in a small hut on the edge of the woods. My childhood was a normal one, full of work and play, being raised by a village in a stern but loving fashion. The woods were my best friend. I ran upon their paths with my earth hardened feet, reveling in the cool soft dirt against my skin. I danced in the dappled sunlight, picked berries and nuts, hid amongst the trees in games of hide-and-seek. Often, when the other children were doing their chores I would sneak away into the woods and sitting with my back propped against an aged oak and imagine that I was a dryad, a child of the woods.
In my fantasies, my parents had found me out here, a babe in a basket, wrapped in green leaves with tousled brown hair and shocking forest colored eyes. Being unable to conceive themselves, they had taken me home to village to raise me as their own. Some day though, my family would come from the trees, from the very core of the woods themselves and fetch me back. I loved the village, and the people I had grown up with, but there was no adventure. Every day was another series of steps, along the same paths to the same ends.
It was one such day, in my 16th year, as I sat with my back supported by the firm warmth of the oak that I sensed a change. I couldn't pinpoint what it was that tipped me off, perhaps a change in the air currents, a smell, a taste at the back of my tongue that was unfamiliar. For moment, I sensed that the nurturing flow of the woods had been broken. Cut by something that was not nurturing, by something that took to survive and didn't complete the circle by giving. For a moment I was scared, but already the feeling was gone and the warmth of the sun was lulling me off to sleep, gently drifting in and out of reality, seeing the beautiful legs and backs and necks of the dryads as they delicately danced in and out of the corner of my vision. There was one of them, reaching toward me with a delicate, moon-pale hand, running her fingers through my hair, cool against the warmth of the woods around me, soothing. “Time to sleep now, little one...”
When I awoke I was on my own pallet in the corner of my own house. I could hear the whisper of the leaves outside my window, and feel the delicate moonlight balanced on my skin. Somehow, I must have gotten home, how strange that I would fall so deeply asleep. I sat up, slowly letting my eyes and body adjust to the night, and then I stood. I had missed supper and my stomach was rumbling fiercely. I started toward the cupboard on the far side of the room where the left over bread was kept, but I was stopped abruptly by the press of a wood against my stomach. Apparently, the kitchen table had been moved the previous afternoon. I pushed further on in the dark, my hands reaching in front of me to the counters edge, but when I got to where it should be I felt only rough wood, and feeling around the edges, I finally found a handle.
At that moment, I was very afraid. I flung the door open to a moonlit clearing. Turning, my eyes adjusting to the new light, I saw that I had been in a small one room hut with a table in the middle, a sleeping mat in one corner and on the far side of the room was a set of cabinets. There was no doorway leading to the sweet lavender and grass smell of my parents room. There were no home-spun curtains on the single window above the bed. No comforting blankets or rugs, lovingly woven by my mother's hands. There was nothing familiar at all.
I stood back against the door frame, willing my breath to calm and as I did I smelled the air. It smelled of night time, of the ashes of a late fire, it smelled of the dark earth in the deepest part of the woods. It did not smell like the village. I stepped outside and the cool air washed over mw, tugging and pulling at the edges of a night dress that was not my own.
A scurrying sound amongst the bushes caught my attention and I turned slowly toward it, calculating. My ears gave me direction, my nose honed in and my eyes told me the distance. I sprang into action, with a speed and stealth I hadn't known I possessed. Moments later I had my hands on a small gray rabbit my mouth at its stomach, my teeth burrowing into its flesh. The warm blood poured down my chin and onto the night dress, turning white to red and I savored the taste as my stomach churned with pleasure to be satiated.
Then I stopped. It was an abrupt stop, not thought out, not considered. I looked down at the limp, mangled body in my hands and tears began to well in my eyes. What was I doing? I had eaten raw meat before, but always captured in a trap, and carefully killed for the most painless, fear-free death. Always with a prayer of thanks to the gods and to the animal's spirit for it's sacrifice. What was I doing? I cradled the small body against my chest, further staining the night dress and I began to rock, gently at first and then with more force, praying to all the gods I knew.
I stayed that way until morning. The first thin rays of sun did not warm me, heart or body. They shown with a pleasure that I could not feel. Another hour came and went and the sun rose higher. Each moment I expected it to embrace me. To call out “Hello Daughter!” and help me along my way as it had done every day of my life. Nothing came. Coldness filled me as it had since I had killed the rabbit.
So I dug, I dug with my hands as if my very life depended on it, and when the hole was deep enough that it wouldn't be disturbed by the other animals, I put the small body in it. I covered the mound with a rock and then I lay across it and my body heaved. No tears came, there were no more to give, but my body still shook with phantom sobs.
Finally, it may have been noon, perhaps before; I stood. I walked back to the hut and I turned once to look at the sun, once my father, and my best friend. Now it taunted me with its bright light and warm glow, a glow I could not feel. I closed the door on the sun and sinking back onto the small pallet in the corner, I slept.
I awoke to the sounds of dusk. Small animals calling each other in, “Hurry, before the dark comes!” I shifted stiffly against the dry grass and pulled the poorly stitched blanket over my head. Why was I waking up now? There was no purpose. The faint scent of jasmine entered my nose and suddenly I was aware of a presence in the room.
Turning slowly to my side I opened my eyes just a glimmer to see a cloaked figure sitting at one of the rough chairs by the table. I couldn't tell if it was looking at me, but I guessed it to be a woman, judging by the perfume that was steadily filling the room. I deepened my breathing. If I slept on, then surely she would leave.
“You may give up on deceiving me now...” the voice was melodic, beautiful and heart-wrenching at the same time. “I knew you were awake, most likely before you were fully aware of it yourself. I can smell your blood as your heart pumps it more quickly, I can hear the faint rustle of the sheets against your skin as your breathing changes, I can see the flutter of your eyelash that says that those lovely green eyes of yours will be opening at any moment. There is no fooling me.”
She stood slowly, none of her movements were hurried and she pushed back the hood of her cloak. At first I was certain that the mother Goddess stood in the room with me, so great was her beauty, but she smiled sadly and shook her head.
“What I would give if I truly were a goddess, little one, able to grant gifts and wishes upon my people, able to give and not take... but I am a much less worthy creature than that.” She stood still, letting me take it all in. Her hair was jet black, blending so well with the night that I would not have known it was there at all if it hadn't contrasted so with her ivory skin. I could not see her eyes clearly, but I could feel their intensity on me and I imagined that they were the darkest of blue, nearly black themselves. She was slender, wearing a dark gown that collected at her waist and bloomed about her like a new spring flower. It was the finest garment that I had ever seen.
There was a quick sputter and then a flicker and she held out her hand. In it was an orb of fire, colored blue and giving off just enough light to cast a circle of illumination about her. Her eyes were indeed blue, reminding me of the lake we went to sometimes to fish. When you jumped in and swam to the bottom you were in a foreign world all colored with blue and green...
My attention snapped back, no time for daydreaming now. Her dress, I saw was black in color, accented with red ribbons at the hips and sleeves. I did not know the fabric, but it reminded me of the smooth river stones, sleek and soft. Her mouth was small and full, a vibrant red, that didn't appear to be at all natural, but still beautiful. Her hair extended to her waist and was flowing free about her, shimmering in the blue light.
“Do you feel comfortable that you know my appearance now?” She inquired, her face did not change, except for her eyes. They spoke of ages of sorrow. I nodded and she cupped her hands together . With a hiss, the fire went out.
“Come along then, we must talk, so that you may understand what has happened to you.” She held out a hand, and I placed mine in it, feeling a thrill of cool energy rush through me, so familiar, yet so foreign. She led me outside, keeping hold of my hand. It would have been comforting; the night air, the full moon, if it hadn't been so strange. She led me out to a fallen log and there we sat, I marveled at the night, the light of the Mother Moon. At least she was still there, not turning me away, her light cool, but still holding me close. I sent out a silent prayer, “Please keep me safe.”
“Aerveta, it's been three days since I brought you here. You slept for the first two, and when you awoke last night I was nearby. I watched you, I saw your confusion, your fear, your sorrow. I will tell you what has happened and the confusion will abate. As the months pass, your fear will also dwindle, until it is gone. The sorrow, however. The sorrow is a curse that we bear, and it will etch itself into your heart so deeply that you will never be able to take a step without knowing it's there. You will live through it, because you have no choice. Sometimes you will even feel happiness, but it will be too strong, it will spill through you, rushing and twisting and you won't know what to do with it. It's important that you learn how to control yourself so that neither the sorrow nor the rushing happiness can control you. Do you understand?” For a moment I thought she would cry, but she shook her head, her black hair catching the moonlight and I nodded.
“I've taken you away from your home, your mother and father, the village that you know and love. I've done it because I love you, although you don't know me. I love you, and I want for you to be safe. Yesterday morning, the King's men rode through your village, they ransacked and pillaged, they killed many men. They set houses afire. Your family is safe, your father has been wounded, but he will live, I've made sure of that. Now they are just rebuilding. No, I see you wanting to argue with me, but let me continue. Every female between the ages of 12 and 20 was taken by the King's men. They are to live as slaves and concubines in the palace, to do his bidding and to amuse his guests. Many young women have been taken there from other villages like yours, not one has lived past their 21st birthday. The older they are, the harder they are worked, it gives the King pleasure to see beautiful young women suffer.” She paused and my stomach grumbled. I thought again of fresh baked bread. To taste it and feel it against my tongue. My mind was wandering now, thinking of stew with elk meat and wild onions. Carrots and potatoes from our fields. My stomach grumbled more loudly.
“You can't have those things, little one. They are not for you any longer. My name is Serene, and now I will take you hunting.” She pulled on my arm, forcing me up and in moments we were speeding along. I couldn't tell if we were flying or running, there were sounds and colors floating by me, through me, but I felt weightless, as if I were putting in no effort at all. Finally, we stopped and before us in a clearing, there was a small campfire and a band of travelers. They were mostly young men, except for one. He was old and wizened, leaning heavily on an Elm wood staff. My mind reeled in confusion.
“Stay here, watch and learn.” Serene lifted her skirts delicately and stepped to the edge of the clearing, just out of range of the firelight. She pulled a pouch from her sleeve and poured some dust into her palm. Then she blew it gently toward the men. It took on a life of its own, twisting and glittering. No one seemed to notice it except the old man. His eyes grew and he looked around, catching a glimpse of Serene. Then his gaze softened and he let his head slouch, as though exhausted, but his eyes were as bright as ever. The dust settled into the fire and it blazed bright blue for a moment. One by one the men slouched, their breath softening and deepening in sleep.
Serene held out her hand to me, and when I reached her, she pulled me gently forward into the clearing. The old man rose and appraised my appearance. My blood stained night gown, my tangled brown curls.
“Come now Serene, you mean to tell me that you couldn't outfit the girl better than this?” He smiled at her, and she smiled back, although her eyes never lost their sadness.
“I haven't gotten to that point yet, Seamus. She's starving, it's been three days, she's only had a rabbit.” The old man nodded knowingly and waved his staff toward the sleeping men.
“You know how to do this better than I do, choose the one you'd like.” She stepped forward softly and cupped each man's head in her hands. Over a few she lingered and some she left quickly. She came back to us.
“Seamus, the lad with the maize colored hair will die within the span of three days, with or without our help. His lungs are filled with coal dust and are failing him quickly. The man with the raven eyes is rash, there is a good chance that he will get himself killed by my sisters before you reach the edge of the woods. He thinks that he can take on the world.” Seamus nodded again.
“Well you best take Lyr then,” he knelt next to the fair haired young man whose breathing was struggling even in sleep. “His mama's heart is going to be broken either way, he's got a clear soul, remember that Serene.” Serene nodded and she and the old man embraced briefly and he returned to his seat by the fire. I watched in dazed confusion as Serene knelt and picked up the young man as if he weighed nothing. She brought him within feet of me and lowering him gently, she embraced him as though he were a lover. She delicately kissed his neck before saying a few words, glancing at the moon. Then, almost more quickly than I could follow, she sank her teeth into his neck. There was none of the blood and gore I had experienced with the rabbit. None of the fear. The young man's body relaxed even further, his lips curving in a contented smile. Serene sucked gently at his flesh and then pulled away.
“Now, Aerveta, nourish yourself.” I looked at her in horror.
“I can't drink his blood! What have you made me?” I turned and looked around, there had to be somewhere to run, somewhere to get away. Before I could move, Serene's arms were around me, embracing me, holding me gently, but firmly. She rocked me to and fro, like a mother rocking her baby, and I felt my body relax against my will.
“I will explain everything to you, my darling, but you cannot go on much longer without nourishment and we have a ways yet to go tonight. For now just follow my directions.” She let me go, and though I felt calmer, I still couldn't do it. My stomach argued with me, cramping with angry hunger.
“Surely they have some bread I could eat, just a bit of bread and water would keep me going all night!” I looked at her urgently and she sighed and turned to Seamus.
“Bread and water then Seamus, don't bring too much, you know...” She trailed off as the old man rose and went to the back of their cart. He returned and handed me a tough hunk of bread and a small dipper of water. I smiled in relief and took a bite of the bread, savoring the flavor and the feel against my tongue. I chewed and I swallowed, feeling happy relief. And then, with a suddenness and a burning, the bread came back up and I fell to the ground, heaving and retching. I grabbed for the dipper of water to sooth my throat, but it only made things worse and my stomach churned with discontent.
After a few moments I was able to sit up and Serene knelt beside me, dabbing my head with a cool, moist cloth. I leaned into her.
“You can no longer eat human food. Your stomach no longer knows how to process it, and there is no nutrition in it for you any longer. All it can do is make you sick. Now, only blood can keep you strong and healthy. To feel your best, it has to be human blood.” She helped me up and took me over to the body of the boy named Lyr. His chest was still rising and falling, but the breaths were ragged and shallow. His skin was pale and his eyes fluttered beneath his lids.
“Now, Aerveta, we don't want him waking, it will only cause him undo pain and fear.” I knelt next to the boy, hardly older than myself and bent my lips to his skin. I tried to be as gentle as Serene had been, but as soon as the blood touched my lips I lost my mind. I went crazy, biting and pulling, wanting and needing. I would have gone on forever, if Serene's cool hands hadn't pulled me back.
“You're done now, he's dead.” I looked, the boy's neck was ragged and bloody. Nothing like it had been after Serene had fed. Serene covered his skin with her hand and when she moved it away, the damage I had done was gone. All that remained were two little prick marks on the side of his neck. She kissed his eyes and moved away.
“Shall we take him, Seamus, or will you bury him?” She looked at the old man whose eyes were heavy with sorrow.
“We'll keep him. The lads and I will bury him in the morning. It's important that they be warned.” His eyes wavered toward the dark haired young man that Serene had pointed out earlier.
“Alright, thank you Seamus. We'll be seeing you again.” She hugged him closely and when she let go, he seemed to have gained vitality, he stood upright and there was a greater glow in his skin, “That should last you...” she said, looking into his eyes and then in a moment, she was at my side and we were flying again, with the colors and the smells rushing around us, through us.

(c) Clair Smith
Next Installment, "Chapter Two~ The Bath House" Coming After I've finished Proofing It. Don't mock me too much...

A perfect day

2008-01-28T15:12:00.001-08:00

The perfect day is a day that...
starts off “right.”
With warm coffee-lipped perfection,
And the embracing lull of good sleep.

The perfect day is a day...
Where you do something spontaneous,
And laugh and love while you do it.

The perfect day is a day...
Where you slice the open an avocado,
And it's ripened just right.

The perfect day is a day...
Where you got hot tubbing in the dark,
With the cold rain coming down,
Creating steam drops on your eyes.

The perfect day is a day...
Where you close your eyes happy
And fall asleep warm and at peace.

Oregon, Then

2008-01-24T12:05:00.000-08:00

(It is important to understand in this dream that Oregon is not the state that we all know and love, it's some sort of demented, trippy alternate plane of existence... just fyi.)

We were standing, looking out at the snow and the mountains, hating the cold, musing over some coming when he approached us. He said that E had died, but how could he know before us? They weren't even friends. I refused to believe it, so I set out on a journey. It's important to know that one should never undertake a journey in a short green skirt and white stilettos, especially when one is hitchhiking cross-country more-or-less. Got dropped off at a dingy gas station in the middle of nowhere. Asking how far out of Oregon I was. 20 miles. Okay, well I can't walk that far in stilettos, where's the ATM machine? Then putting my card in and getting a ton of pictures of myself back before receiving $94 instead of $100. Going back in the dingy gas station.

"Can I pay anyone to give me a ride up there?"

"Why don't you just hang around and watch --- tattoo?"

"In this dingy place? I live with a tattoo artist, why would I need to watch it here?"

"Well then, we can arrange something, come over here and give me a kiss." A kiss on the cheek, a brush of the breast, a swing of the hair and I'm out the door, walking those last 20 miles on 4 inch stilettos, crumbling asphalt, and broken glass.

Arriving in Oregon, heels clicking on the boardwalks. It's really more like a giant ship. Finding the amphitheater, looking around. Seeing my father. Ah, normalcy. Sitting down with him and Grandpa, watching the clowns perform. Then looking up and seeing my grandparents walk by, younger, on a date. Turning to see Grandpa crying.

"Only a few of us can get in here.... it's a different plane, a place of the past." Dad says. I go to get a drink. Walking in stilettos will do that to you. Man with a suit and a hat sees me, chases me. Not sure what he wants, but it can't be good. Damn these shoes. Running back to the amphitheatre, can't see anyone I know, just distorted faces. Down an alley, down a stair-case into a calm white room. A man there doing branding, or is it tattooing? Who knows.

"Don't worry, we don't let scum like that in here." Finally, I get to sit for awhile.

B comes, he hugs me, he loves me.... but then.

You can't stay here, you don't belong here, you have to back home." Pointing to a dingy white motorcycle. Not sure it's going to hold together, I have no helmet... no jacket, but...well it's the only chance I've got. Riding...with skirt blowing.

Coming out of a trance. Nobody believes where I've been, they only know that I've been gone for three days... strange, but there are no alternate planes, no parallels. Going to the store with my mother, taking food to the old man in the hospital bed, the only one who believes me.

Walking into the parking lot and seeing the dingy white motorcycle parked between two hunky yellow crotch-rockets. So it was real...

(I'm gonna go ahead and leave out the last section of this dream for coign's privacy.)

The Cat's in the Cradle...

2008-01-24T11:41:00.000-08:00

I awoke to find Grey Kitty in our house, milling about. My first thought was, "Well alright, you can hang out for a bit if you'd like." It wasn't long, however before he started harassing Piggy and trying to use various holding facilities as litter boxes. So I picked his furry little butt up and took him to the door. But upon sliding it open, I noticed that there were two kittens sitting next to it. A black one and an orange tiger kitten. They were smaller than small, and so fuzzy and cute. So I thought my hopes had come true, and the perfect kittens had appeared for me. After all, what's another kitten amongst friends? So I took them into the bedroom, where Brandon was still sleeping, and put their furry little bodies on the bed and they wrestled and cuddled and were all around cute. We were ecstatic. Meanwhile, Brandon had previously made a great mess of the house, and upon exiting our bedroom we found that there were more little kittens! Calicoes and striped ones! They were everywhere, and so small that they were getting lost amongst the stuff. I went to the front door, to step outside and get some air, and in doing so, tripped over a dog brush. A blond woman approached me, saying that she was sorry that she had put the kittens in our house, and she would take them back now and give me a puppy instead. It was only that she'd seen the kittens at the fair in a little glass aquarium and had felt so bad for them! So I told her not to worry and that we would find good homes for them. I went back inside and realized that I would have to kitty-proof piggy's cage, because already Gray Kitty had returned and was pawing at her. But when I looked in the cage, there wasn't just a piggy, but she was green, covered in hay and frantic because in the corner there was a wee mite of a hamster. Looking around in the clutter I found a hamster house (no idea where it came from.) and although I knew that it was too small for him to live in, it would do as a holding facility for the time being. When I went to try and grab him though, he burrowed into popcorn (yeah, I dunno where that came from.) and then came quite a fiasco where I tried to catch him and he tried to slip through the bars on the piggy cage. Finally, I caught him and just as I did, my mother walked through the door. By this point it was evening and the kittens were hungry and using the bathroom everywhere, and the hamster really needed his own living space...so Mom and I went to Petsmart while B posted a Craigslist ad. When we got to Petsmart there were rows and rows of cash registers, but nothing else was there, so we returned home to chaos. Then, I woke up.
Pic lovingly stolen from AnimalKind, Inc.